It has come to my attention, both in my practice, and in a recent review of results from a large survey, that many people are using the internet so much that other areas of their life are suffering.
For university students in particular, a high percentage of individuals report that their internet use is adversely affecting their grades.
The internet can gobble up time in numerous ways: if you are bored, you can find an endless stream of connections that can keep your mind absorbed with new tangents.
Many people use the internet to communicate with others. The internet can be a wonderful technological aid which fosters closeness, expands our community of friends and peers, etc. But it can also cause us to be so absorbed in the activity itself -- of talking to friends, or perhaps to strangers -- that hours of time pass by. Sometimes these hours are spent online when they might otherwise have been spent visiting a friend in person, doing a healthy activity outside, studying, etc. Sometimes these hours are spent in the middle of the night, instead of sleeping.
There are other addictive lures that may snag people's attention, including games, gambling, and porn. Perhaps all of these activities allow people to enjoy certain aspects of life with greater freedom and discretion. But they can be very addictive, in the sense that a relationship can be formed with the activity, at the expense of other life relationships (e.g. with other friends or loved ones, with work, with school, with other interests, with physical self care and exercise, etc.).
So I'm not saying that the internet is bad. But I encourage people to be careful not to be involved with a computer in an addictive way, in a way that is interfering with other life activities and relationships.
To some degree this is a cultural issue -- our modern culture is changing, and the computer is becoming increasingly a part of it. This may be integrated in a way that is healthy and part of a new "normalness", just as any new technological innovation changes behaviour and culture (from the invention of the wheel or of fire, to the printing press, to the automobile, to the TV, etc.). There are those who resist any cultural change, or pronounce it to be unhealthy. So the internet is here to stay, and I hope can remain an enhancement to our culture -- but we need to learn ways to participate in the culture in a way that is safe and healthy, and to be aware of its dangers (just as we need to be aware of the dangers of fire, wheels, or the automobile).
As a formal challenge, I encourage people to try a month without using the internet at all, and to assess how life is different during that time.
I have made a similar challenge to people about TV, to turn it off completely for a month, then to review any differences in the way they feel.
I recognize the irony that I am making these statements in a forum only available on the internet!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Boredom
The feeling of boredom may be a signal to change what we are doing, to seek something more stimulating or pleasurable.
Many signals that the brain gives us are helpful guides, which lead us to make better decisions.
Other times, the signals the brain gives us are misleading.
In the case of boredom, the brain may be conditioned to expect a lack of stimulation or pleasure in a given activity. And it may be conditioned to expect stimulation or pleasure by leaving this activity. If this behavioural pathway is followed, it may further lead to a conditioning effect, in which the initial activity feels even more boring the next time round. It is like the forest path again, and each time you go down the path, it becomes more established.
I believe that in many cases the brain causes us to leave experiences prematurely. There might be much more pleasure, stimulation, and meaning in activities that are felt to be boring, but the brain is too habitually eager to get us out quickly, to the alternate activity.
As an exercise, I encourage practicing ways to discover interest, stimulation, meaning, and pleasure, in activities that you have pronounced to be boring (e.g. working through a textbook for school; getting through a work shift; commuting; conversing with someone who isn't your favourite person, etc.). It may require looking at the experience in a different way, with an eye to find significance, meaning, and interest, rather than focusing on the aspects that you find tiresome.
One very specific way to discover this change of perception is to take a class in drawing, painting, or photography -- often part of the experience is of learning to see things in a different way, to become absorbed with interest in something you thought was mundane. Another technique is to take courses in meditation, in which one can learn to be more at peace with the present moment, even while sitting quietly with almost no external stimuli.
In my work with students, I believe this is an extremely important issue. Many students have enrolled in a course of study that may last at least four years, or may lead to a lifetime career. Yet they are bored with what they are doing. I strongly encourage choosing courses (or other life decisions) that have a hope to be interesting, and coming to the work with an attitude of finding significance, meaning, and interest, rather than expecting or continuing an experience of boredom. Boredom leads to disengagement, a fractured relationship with what you are doing, and can be the beginning of lifelong unhappiness with the present moment.
While you may need to make external changes, it is important to make a strong effort to direct internal changes too.
Many signals that the brain gives us are helpful guides, which lead us to make better decisions.
Other times, the signals the brain gives us are misleading.
In the case of boredom, the brain may be conditioned to expect a lack of stimulation or pleasure in a given activity. And it may be conditioned to expect stimulation or pleasure by leaving this activity. If this behavioural pathway is followed, it may further lead to a conditioning effect, in which the initial activity feels even more boring the next time round. It is like the forest path again, and each time you go down the path, it becomes more established.
I believe that in many cases the brain causes us to leave experiences prematurely. There might be much more pleasure, stimulation, and meaning in activities that are felt to be boring, but the brain is too habitually eager to get us out quickly, to the alternate activity.
As an exercise, I encourage practicing ways to discover interest, stimulation, meaning, and pleasure, in activities that you have pronounced to be boring (e.g. working through a textbook for school; getting through a work shift; commuting; conversing with someone who isn't your favourite person, etc.). It may require looking at the experience in a different way, with an eye to find significance, meaning, and interest, rather than focusing on the aspects that you find tiresome.
One very specific way to discover this change of perception is to take a class in drawing, painting, or photography -- often part of the experience is of learning to see things in a different way, to become absorbed with interest in something you thought was mundane. Another technique is to take courses in meditation, in which one can learn to be more at peace with the present moment, even while sitting quietly with almost no external stimuli.
In my work with students, I believe this is an extremely important issue. Many students have enrolled in a course of study that may last at least four years, or may lead to a lifetime career. Yet they are bored with what they are doing. I strongly encourage choosing courses (or other life decisions) that have a hope to be interesting, and coming to the work with an attitude of finding significance, meaning, and interest, rather than expecting or continuing an experience of boredom. Boredom leads to disengagement, a fractured relationship with what you are doing, and can be the beginning of lifelong unhappiness with the present moment.
While you may need to make external changes, it is important to make a strong effort to direct internal changes too.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Music & Repetition
Life is full of repetition.
Life problems, including many of those associated with depression, involve a lot of repetition, and monotony.
Symptoms recur. Relationship problems recur. Problematic themes recur.
We often seek to end the repetition.
Sometimes it is necessary to end the repetitive cycles, if we can see them.
Other times, I think one can work with repetition in a similar way as occurs in music.
Music is repetitious. The rhythm or beat may be constant. Various accompaniments may be the same throughout. Themes within a piece of music may continuously recur. Without some degree of repetition, a musical piece would seem confusing or aimless. Changes, colourations, variations, and harmonies can transform monotonous repetition into a beautiful and dynamic composition. Repetition itself may not be the problem.
I encourage the idea of managing some recurrent life themes in a musical way --your repetitive theme could be part of a meaningful composition. Also, a musical approach may permit you to work through the old theme, say goodbye to it, and introduce something new.
Life problems, including many of those associated with depression, involve a lot of repetition, and monotony.
Symptoms recur. Relationship problems recur. Problematic themes recur.
We often seek to end the repetition.
Sometimes it is necessary to end the repetitive cycles, if we can see them.
Other times, I think one can work with repetition in a similar way as occurs in music.
Music is repetitious. The rhythm or beat may be constant. Various accompaniments may be the same throughout. Themes within a piece of music may continuously recur. Without some degree of repetition, a musical piece would seem confusing or aimless. Changes, colourations, variations, and harmonies can transform monotonous repetition into a beautiful and dynamic composition. Repetition itself may not be the problem.
I encourage the idea of managing some recurrent life themes in a musical way --your repetitive theme could be part of a meaningful composition. Also, a musical approach may permit you to work through the old theme, say goodbye to it, and introduce something new.
Activation Energy
In chemistry, there are atoms or molecules that can react very strongly with one another, perhaps leading to a new molecule, or to a release of energy.
Yet, these particles may not react, unless they have a sufficient energy, the "activation energy".
The activation energy is like a fence to climb over before you can ski down a hill. Often times, the reactions don't happen in our lives, because we do not climb over the fence, we do not reach the activation energy.
Some reasons for the activation energy phenomenon may be that some particles need to be "pushed together" energetically in order to react. You may need to push yourself sometimes into an action that ends up being extremely meaningful and self-sustaining.
Other reasons for an activation energy barrier could be "geometric". For example, a key or a puzzle piece may fit, but it has to be placed in just the right way, at just the right orientation or angle, in order to work. Pushing harder and harder will not solve this problem. Sometimes we push ourselves, things seem not to fit, but it is because we are approaching the problem at the wrong angle.
Catalysts are things that reduce the activation energy barrier. Sometimes the fence in front of the hill is too tall to climb. A catalyst is like a gate in the fence. Or it could be an environment in which things fit together more easily (e.g. it could be like having surrounding portions of the puzzle done for you, permitting you to more easily place your piece with more clues).
Behaviourally, we must be willing to invest "activation energy" into new actions and ideas. The resulting reaction may pay off, and return much more energy and meaning.
We must also search for, and be willing to use, catalysts. A social catalyst might be a friend, who could help introduce us to new friends. Or it might simply be a place where you feel comfortable -- such as a community centre, school, coffee shop, church, etc. The physical place may be a catalyst to help you meet a new friend, or attain greater social comfort.
I think therapy is a catalytic process in many ways, in that it may not always provide energy for action directly, but could help provide a "surface" in the form of a therapeutic frame, a place to re-organize our orientation to things, permitting reactions to more easily occur.
Yet, these particles may not react, unless they have a sufficient energy, the "activation energy".
The activation energy is like a fence to climb over before you can ski down a hill. Often times, the reactions don't happen in our lives, because we do not climb over the fence, we do not reach the activation energy.
Some reasons for the activation energy phenomenon may be that some particles need to be "pushed together" energetically in order to react. You may need to push yourself sometimes into an action that ends up being extremely meaningful and self-sustaining.
Other reasons for an activation energy barrier could be "geometric". For example, a key or a puzzle piece may fit, but it has to be placed in just the right way, at just the right orientation or angle, in order to work. Pushing harder and harder will not solve this problem. Sometimes we push ourselves, things seem not to fit, but it is because we are approaching the problem at the wrong angle.
Catalysts are things that reduce the activation energy barrier. Sometimes the fence in front of the hill is too tall to climb. A catalyst is like a gate in the fence. Or it could be an environment in which things fit together more easily (e.g. it could be like having surrounding portions of the puzzle done for you, permitting you to more easily place your piece with more clues).
Behaviourally, we must be willing to invest "activation energy" into new actions and ideas. The resulting reaction may pay off, and return much more energy and meaning.
We must also search for, and be willing to use, catalysts. A social catalyst might be a friend, who could help introduce us to new friends. Or it might simply be a place where you feel comfortable -- such as a community centre, school, coffee shop, church, etc. The physical place may be a catalyst to help you meet a new friend, or attain greater social comfort.
I think therapy is a catalytic process in many ways, in that it may not always provide energy for action directly, but could help provide a "surface" in the form of a therapeutic frame, a place to re-organize our orientation to things, permitting reactions to more easily occur.
Tree Metaphor
Imagine your self as a tree. You require soil, water, and sun.
How does water ascend from the soil all the way up to the tips of your leaves?
A small portion of the energy may come from your roots.
The pathways inside of you are mainly conduits for the water to rise, and cannot really pump the water upwards.
Most of the energy comes from the sun, from energy that causes evaporation in our leaves. This creates suction. This energy is so powerful that it can draw water up to the top of a 100 metre redwood tree.
reference:
http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?id=how-do-large-trees-such-a
I see this as an analogy to energy and motivation in our lives. We can't provide all of our own energy and motivation. We must be involved in external things which draw action out of us, as the sun and its evaporative effects draw water all the way up a very tall tree. This leads to continuous "columns" of action, beginning at the roots, ascending to the outer portions of our selves. Others (other relationships, other involvements in community) are necessary to keep this cycle going. It is very hard to generate your own motivation all alone--"root pressure alone" can only go so far.
Many of my patients with low motivation and energy try very hard to initiate activity. A turning point can often be when they become involved with others, or with a community, or with some other external structure, that can help keep this "column" of motivation rising to new heights.
How does water ascend from the soil all the way up to the tips of your leaves?
A small portion of the energy may come from your roots.
The pathways inside of you are mainly conduits for the water to rise, and cannot really pump the water upwards.
Most of the energy comes from the sun, from energy that causes evaporation in our leaves. This creates suction. This energy is so powerful that it can draw water up to the top of a 100 metre redwood tree.
reference:
http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?id=how-do-large-trees-such-a
I see this as an analogy to energy and motivation in our lives. We can't provide all of our own energy and motivation. We must be involved in external things which draw action out of us, as the sun and its evaporative effects draw water all the way up a very tall tree. This leads to continuous "columns" of action, beginning at the roots, ascending to the outer portions of our selves. Others (other relationships, other involvements in community) are necessary to keep this cycle going. It is very hard to generate your own motivation all alone--"root pressure alone" can only go so far.
Many of my patients with low motivation and energy try very hard to initiate activity. A turning point can often be when they become involved with others, or with a community, or with some other external structure, that can help keep this "column" of motivation rising to new heights.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)